Hi Lucy, I get a version of your feelings every time I feel compelled to admit I have no children and therefore can "afford" a very free and malleable lifestyle and the looks I get are kind of "poor you (no children)" but also "lucky you". I never know how to deal with these reactions. I also feel, like you and Rosie (comments), that having (freedom) in a not standard life format, is perceived as having less quality of fulfilment; I find it so strange because where I'm now allows me to pursue all things that fulfil me like volunteering in causes I relate to. Thank you for your sharing, it's so nice to hear from other people in similar contexts. have a great day!
Thank you, Ana. I love that you have a free and malleable lifestyle!
I’m much more comfortable talking about my ‘situation’ than I ever was. I think the freedom thing has made me very happy. It’s also helped me (and sometimes made me) find new interests and community.
It’s interesting that when I was asked ‘what’s your situation?’ I initially thought of my job and where I live, whereas a few years ago I might not have felt so confident and might have jabbered on about being single. I’m fortunate to love my job and where I live so I’m happy those things sprung to mind first.
I loved reading this Lucy and felt like it really resonated my own situation...just came across your Substack but looking forward to following and reading more 🥰
I love this Lucy. I feel so similar and see many echos with my own life so i understand the importance of your honesty and know first hand how even tiny deviations from 'a norm' can be projected back as something not as legitimate as everyone else. I'm just rushing to the eutostar (a childfree 40 year old who holidays with her mum), where I will read this again x
I think it was the way it was asked, and the setting we were in that made me think she was curious about my life status, if you see what I mean. I also think it’s a slightly odd question - and definitely one that’s sparked thoughts and discussion.
Hi Lucy, I get a version of your feelings every time I feel compelled to admit I have no children and therefore can "afford" a very free and malleable lifestyle and the looks I get are kind of "poor you (no children)" but also "lucky you". I never know how to deal with these reactions. I also feel, like you and Rosie (comments), that having (freedom) in a not standard life format, is perceived as having less quality of fulfilment; I find it so strange because where I'm now allows me to pursue all things that fulfil me like volunteering in causes I relate to. Thank you for your sharing, it's so nice to hear from other people in similar contexts. have a great day!
Thank you, Ana. I love that you have a free and malleable lifestyle!
I’m much more comfortable talking about my ‘situation’ than I ever was. I think the freedom thing has made me very happy. It’s also helped me (and sometimes made me) find new interests and community.
It’s interesting that when I was asked ‘what’s your situation?’ I initially thought of my job and where I live, whereas a few years ago I might not have felt so confident and might have jabbered on about being single. I’m fortunate to love my job and where I live so I’m happy those things sprung to mind first.
I loved reading this Lucy and felt like it really resonated my own situation...just came across your Substack but looking forward to following and reading more 🥰
Thank you, Gemma! It’s great to have you here.
I think I understand your quandary on a seemingly strangely worded question... but I love the poem you got out of it!!
Thank you, Jess!
I love this Lucy. I feel so similar and see many echos with my own life so i understand the importance of your honesty and know first hand how even tiny deviations from 'a norm' can be projected back as something not as legitimate as everyone else. I'm just rushing to the eutostar (a childfree 40 year old who holidays with her mum), where I will read this again x
Ah thank you Rosie. I also holiday with my mum- I hope you have a wonderful time. Maybe a subject for a future newsletter! X
Boy you read a lot into that question 😀
This is exactly what I thought as well.
I think it was the way it was asked, and the setting we were in that made me think she was curious about my life status, if you see what I mean. I also think it’s a slightly odd question - and definitely one that’s sparked thoughts and discussion.